Tiger Woods Shag Bag, Liar Stevie Williams #PGA

Three brief Tiger Woods stories, only one of which deals directly with his sexual appetites. A change to say the least.

First, a person “with knowledge of Tiger’s schedule’ was reported as saying that he has returned to his home and has begun resuming a 'routine that includes fitness and golf'.'

What a joke. Someone with ‘knowledge of his schedule’ is saying this? Just put it on TigerWoods.com and be done with it. Don’t go through the charade of a leak, and an anonymous report. Just tell everyone that you are back, you are getting ready to play again, and that’s that. But he had to be Tiger. He had to control, float a balloon, see how that would be perceived, and he did it through the safety of a ‘source’. Cowardly. Use your North Korean-esque website to disseminate the info and move on.

Perhaps the only thing you said during your televised press release that seemed even remotely sincere was that you were not going to rush back and play golf. It sounded like the one sacrifice that actually meant something to you; postponing your sporting achievements. But you’re back, and it seems like you will be back sooner than later. And I’m not the only who who thinks so...

Jack Nicklaus says that he expects Woods to play in the Masters and to play an event before that as well.

From ESPN.com:

"It would surprise me if he didn't [play]," Nicklaus said Wednesday. "Oh yeah, I can't imagine in a hundred years he is going to miss Augusta."...."I suspect he'll play something before Augusta," Nicklaus said. "Your guess is as good as mine. I would be very surprised if he didn't play something before Augusta."

Who knows if Jack has spoken to Tiger, has any insights regarding Tiger, or anything else. It may just be one man’s opinion, but as maybe the only other person on the planet who knows how much major championships mean to Tiger, it can’t be totally discounted.

Nickalus knows Tiger is about those four events, and just giving one away seems more unlikely by the day. Especially after his ‘schedule’ was leaked.

Lastly, his caddy/vigilante/valet/all-around menace, Steve Williams, told New Zealand’s version of 60 Minutes that he didn’t know about Tiger’s sex addiction and if he had, he would have said something. Uh huh. Let’s try and and not lose focus by trying to imagine what a Kiwi 60 Minutes might look like, (sheep, sheep, Xena, sheep, rugby, the Haka dance, sheep, Steve Williams, sheep, meat pie, we’re not Australian), and concentrate on what he said.

Lie. Pants on fire, and all that. Williams traveled the world with Woods, he spent countless hours on planes, on the course, at the range, etc, and he knew nothing? Simply impossible. I am not saying that he was in the Pancake House with Woods helping him close, but the idea that he knew nothing is impossible for me to accept. He would have stumbled across one of those bimbos after all that time. They were coming out of the woodwork, he’s on the inside of Team Tiger and he knew nothing? Fail.

But his Colonel Klink “I know nothing!” routine is George Washington level truth telling, compared to his, ‘I would have called Tiger out had I known’ line of crap. Another lie. Let’s take a quick look at Tiger’s history. People that speak up, or offer any sort of insight that isn’t '100% Tiger Approved' are immediately ex-communicated from his holiness' employ and never allowed back in.

Steve Williams carries a golf bag, wipes the grooves of his boss’ clubs clean, and tells people to shut up and hold still. Because he is good at these tasks; is willing to verbally assault the paying customers and smash their photographic equipment, and will deliver the occasional ‘Phil Mickelson is an a-hole’ bomb, he gets paid millions of dollars. He travels by private aircraft, he stays in fine hotels, and has become a celebrity in his own right.

Williams would jeopardize all of this by telling his boss, one of the most vindictive grudge holders known to man, that he needs to keep his pants on? Sure he would. I am sure there are lots of caddy jobs out there that could make him a famous millionaire. I am sure he would lay it all on the line like that because 'he likes Elin too'.

Tiger may have lied to all of us for a very long time, but the whoppers that ‘Stevie” just told makes him the leader in the Liar Clubhouse.

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